Book Club

Life’s Evening Hour
By John Dugdale
August Press, 2000, ISBN: 0-9672484-2-6
Review by Keltie Creed

You won’t find John Dugdale’s Life’s Evening Hour in most Employment Resource Centres, but I personally can’t think of a more inspiring resource when addressing transition, job accommodation or diversity.

John Dugdale was a successful commercial photographer when in 1993 he lost his vision due to a stroke caused by AIDS. Although experiencing great fear and despair, he chose to continue working as a photographer. Life’s Evening Hour is an annotated collection of Dugdale’s moving and strikingly beautiful photographs, Emily Dickinson poems, biblical quotes and his honest explanation of the emotions and thoughts that he experienced as his life changed.

Technically blind, after several operations Dugdale retains less than 20% of his peripheral vision in one eye, blurred to the point that he must simultaneously wear two pairs of glasses and use a strong magnifier to make use of a tiny field of vision. In contrast to the usual method of speed snapping multiple images to capture the best moment on film, he will take up to four hours to focus a single shot composed in his mind and explained in minute detail to the subjects or an assistant.

No longer able to work with chemicals to develop his work, Dugdale now exclusively uses a turn-of-the-century technique, cyanotype, which only requires exposure to light. The resulting blue images are haunting in their beauty and serenity.

My favourite photo is “Postlude”, showing a transparent, almost ghostly image of John Dugdale playing a pump organ. Dugdale writes:

“How did it feel to go from being fully sighted with 20-20 vision to having almost no sight? I developed a feeling of transparency. I have photographed myself as a transparent figure…because I often feel like an ephemeral creature, a ghost unable to see clearly…One would think that everyone else would be invisible to me, but strangely enough it’s the other way around. It’s odd not to be able to see your own reflection.”

Dugdale’s descriptions and photographs explore his struggle to cope with loss, fear and despair, discovery and hope, and above all, his learning. It is a very spiritual book and the artist is far from invisible as he bares his soul and shares his incredible journey so compellingly. There is a good example of both his photography and his thoughtful prose at www.robertkleingallery.com/gallery/dugdale. There is a site for a video (also entitled Life’s Evening Hour) where they have excerpted a section where he talks of the moment he realized that his vision loss was permanent. Small versions of some of his photographs are also on the site, but the full size plates in the book allow their full impact.

Dugdale is honest and open about his losses, his struggle, his loves and his faith. Some may find his decision to photograph some people nude, so that their spirits are not concealed, to be distracting. Others may not appreciate the images of men holding each other, while still others may not relate to his religious metaphors. But if we are better counsellors when we try to live within the circle of others as Laura Kerr suggests in her article, then this could help us to understand clients who are experiencing great loss, are HIV positive, have disabilities or are gay. It also shows us how perseverance and a willingness to try new approaches can bring success. Dugdale is both financially and artistically more successful now than prior to his vision loss. I leave you with another of his thoughts.

“What do I see? Although my sight has changed radically, I see exactly as I always did, but now from the inside out…my eyes are closed but my mind is on fire.”